The Enquirer 2010 DEC 2010

andyson 6,415 Posts

Mon, Dec 6 2010 1:11 PM

• Just got my new copy of the Enquirer at the check-out line.
  
  
  
  
  
  
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  doctortom 563 Posts

  Mon, Dec 6 2010 1:40 PM

  simply genius
  
  
  
  
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  Doublemochaman 2,009 Posts

  Mon, Dec 6 2010 1:54 PM

  Choice!  Just glad I didn't make this issue.  The scandalous story in last month's issue about my secrets of drinking yourself to a smooth, well-oiled swing was embarassing enough.
  
  
  
  
  
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  YancyCan 3,023 Posts

  Mon, Dec 6 2010 1:54 PM

   
  I would personally like to thank Andyson and the fine common folk at the WGT Enquirer for giving this simple man a forum to finally tell me story about when I was abducted and such up off the Kiawah Islands.
  Soon I will be sharing THE WHOLE STORY with my fellow WGTers. I am editing down the article as it is like 9 pages with all the graphics and schematics that go with.
  FIRST.....I need to read the other compelling stories in this issue starting with the one about The Sarge!
  Best Regards - Yancy
  Yancy's WGT YouTube Tootorial & Golfin Tips Vidyas Channel:
  https://www.youtube.com/user/yancycan
  
  
  
  
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  LizzieRossetti 1,545 Posts

  Mon, Dec 6 2010 4:18 PM

  Weeehah!
  So,turned down by the Bodelian huh?Well IN YER FACE BODELIAN! I made the ENQUIRER!
  And fer the benignfit of those too mean or sqeamish to lash out the creds,heres the hole pome in its rich bright glittered fulness.
                             'Twas the night before my colonoscopy
  Dimpsey turned her frost hoared cheek,the sun was waning quick
  A day of bells like meter jingles,mid deep bethpage rough so slick
  All my woods snuggled soft,and wearing ribboned hoods
  Next and mingled to iron,wedge,nay all my golfing goods
  I strolled replete,I walked in jaunty step I did,
  And thus engaged,did not see,where bigfoot he had hid
  Aye passed he by with ne'er a nod,nor felt his breath against my cheek
  Wandered on feckless I,tootled by and past the 17th creek
  From on high,yes in the scented sky I watched a starbright glow
  Sun now bid his last goodbye,ball filled brook beside me now did flow
  To all the world no such pleasure could ever fill
  Nor my joy at a 32,could nothing ever kill
  But hark! a noise disturbs my tranquil wander
  Turning deft a shadow fleets,and sudden causes me to ponder
  Quickened pulse now matched by step,I hurry time apace
  In the trees a welcome light,I feel the glow upon my face
  Turning thus my senses rare,I tramp heavy 'cross the green
  Heading urgent fast and quick,away from what I thought I'd seen
  I passed a twisted spider,its last bad putt its sentance there
  Stuck for all the world,inside a rabbit warren lair
  I dare not tarry and hurry by,that light glowing blue
  I step across the foxgloves,to where I have no clue
  Mildewed balls underfoot,lost long before my time
  Glowered trees spiked and sad,far from looking fine
  Still behind I hear that swish,like ding missed 50 shot
  And furthermore,the footsteps,into mine they seem to slot
  Now the heaving throws of something large,breaking twigs at will
  I fear the more,for being short,I fancy I have little blood to spill
  Tripping here and stumbled much,I final reach that light
  Not the keewah rental,nor anything so nice,I screaming sense my plight
  A humming now,surround sound awful 'pon the ear
  A light so hot,I feel my skin,I feel it start to sear
  Oh Lor for me!Oh who can save me now,I'm done
  Fearing crispy crittered Liz,ere before the rise of next days sun
  And in the tumult in the toss,a voice so sonorous loud
  Hacking slash right behind,above me shimmering misty cloud
  Shapes that whisper in my sight,and fuse as if all one
  To my knees I fall,find a golfers bag,to crash my head upon
  That voice again uncommon deep,yet something in it tolls
  I quickly flash zapruda lens,and think of grassy knolls
  It spake my name,I'm sure of that,tho' fuzzed and crackled so
  I hear in mighty tone,it telling bigfoot that he must away and go
  Bigfoot turns,yelling fear,and in his turn he makes a wind,just like a fan
  And I look up this Christmas eve,to my saviour,Yancy Can
   
   
  Woo! Check me out!(Actually you can at www.freewebs.com/rossettihighplaces/ or just google "The Rossetti pages")
  Lizziex
   
  
  
  
  
  
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  mohuyu 891 Posts

  Mon, Dec 6 2010 5:12 PM

  LMAO - it just gets better and better with every issue. G.I.R.L.S scanner whatever next...
  
  
  
  
  
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  andyson 6,415 Posts

  Tue, Dec 7 2010 8:22 AM

  Bump cuz Lizzie's got talent!
  
  
  
  
  
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  PugsAce 1,825 Posts

  Tue, Dec 7 2010 9:40 AM

  
  

  andyson:
  Bump cuz Lizzie's got talent!
  

  
   
  Wow!... I'll say!  :]
  The laffs are definitely coming in bunches this morning! lol
  Again... frikkin' hilarious stuff, Andy... and, ummm... Lizzie...? ... yer equally talented poetudeness is showing!   
  Great talent!
  Thanks for the laffs, guys.
  PA
   
  
  
  
  
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  oneputtdavid 1,337 Posts

  Tue, Dec 7 2010 12:35 PM

  
  

  andyson:
  .....got talent!

  
  Pulitzer eligible editorial's andyson.. 
  
  
  
  
  
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  nickuk 967 Posts

  Tue, Dec 7 2010 3:04 PM

  lets hope she`s as pretty as she looks....and not pre-op! (hilarious)
  

YancyCan 3,023 Posts

Tue, Dec 7 2010 7:41 PM

nickuk:

lets hope she`s as pretty as she looks....and not pre-op! (hilarious)